13-09-2012

Has been a weird couple of day's, have had to tell the 2nd women that I love, that I will never want anything of her, if I want to continue to be able to see her, I will have to make that consetion. But at the same time, this Lesbian life is oh so confusing for me.
   I am attracted to a woman I can in no way, have any form of fun with, she appears to be happily married to a man, no kids, medical reasons. There does seems to be something mutual there, she said something about my hair yesterday, I said I would love to see hers, she's muslim, I then felt highly honoured, as she then said, she will show me, when there are no guy's around, she is fully aware of my history, but it means that she only thinks of me as a woman.
 She isn't a stick insect figured woman, but with a proper curvey body, this is oh so strange for me, it is in no way anywhere near how I have felt before, when attracted to somebody, but this is in no way means I was just over confused with A, I do love that woman, she helped to open my eye's to one side of woman hood that I may never have seen, I sure as hell would never have experienced lesbian sex with out her, and am in no way complaining, lets be seriouse, can oh so do without a guy ramming his bits into me, lets be seriouse; lesbian sex is oh so more loving, more tender, just oh so WOW.
 I know A will read this sometime, she will know that the hormonal side of womanhood was such a surprise for me, admittedly she was part of the reason it was awakened in me, hey, anything involving A and me, I'm not complaining. No matter what, I can alway's talk to A, I can be completely open with her, and she can be oh so understanding too, I know she say's she loves me, and she must, as she trying oh so hard to understand us, she's even tried to find out all about CX GIC, Charing Cross Gender Identity Clinic, however, all that did, was confuse her even more, never know, she might come with me, to my next visit at the end of the month.







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