23-09-2012
Am back at CX next Monday, wil have to have a seriouse discuss things with Seal, ok never went back to 4mg, stopped at 6, but so need to return to 8, as testiscles appear to be reasserting, if I get prescription this week, will see about getting injected early, so don't want/need my male side to reassert. Am finaly gaining stability within myself, got off the Hetero idea at last, males are so thank fully Surplus To Requirement, was oh amazing to discover the beauty of girl on girl, is oh such a pity that the woman that helped me discover it, needs to keep her distance, I can ubnderstand it, will be oh so much better to keep her as afriend, rather than lose her. This new way of looking at friendships is oh so amazing, that realising why it is, us girls have so many friends, is not that they are friends as such, just people that we get on with, at least 3/4 of the Roystan say hi when I see them, that includes the ones that I have only seen in there, and don't even know their names, is that because they have seen me in there, they say hi.
Got some good news about 2-3 day's ago, JT could be back in UK for Rememberance Weekend, that'll be good, after chatting with me for so long, getting to meet. At same time, could be meeting BarryH, from Transmission.
Also tickets for Rememberance are in the pipeline?
Any institution or person using this site or any of its associated sites for study or projects - You do not have my permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current or future. If you have or do, it will be considered a serious violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.
Sunday 23 September 2012
Monday 17 September 2012
17-09-2012
Last night was strange, was in gingerbeer.com, as per usual, seemed to be a new girl in there, so later as the night went on, told her I was MtF, Male to Female, obviousely on the lesbian scene everyone is aware that MtF means am trans. One of the girls, that have been chatting with for ages, then turns around, and say's she was fully unaware, she thought I was another woman. So one test passed, have passed on a lesbian chatsite as a woman? One of those RLE tests passed, have passed as a women, in the hardest area, the mental area, so without trying, am conversing as a woman, may not sound like much, but if you look at the newspapers, you can see which articles were written by men, which by women, unless they are long term profesional journos, then they convert into a non sexual entity, or are they like that in reality anyway?
Any institution or person using this site or any of its associated sites for study or projects - You do not have my permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current or future. If you have or do, it will be considered a serious violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.
Last night was strange, was in gingerbeer.com, as per usual, seemed to be a new girl in there, so later as the night went on, told her I was MtF, Male to Female, obviousely on the lesbian scene everyone is aware that MtF means am trans. One of the girls, that have been chatting with for ages, then turns around, and say's she was fully unaware, she thought I was another woman. So one test passed, have passed on a lesbian chatsite as a woman? One of those RLE tests passed, have passed as a women, in the hardest area, the mental area, so without trying, am conversing as a woman, may not sound like much, but if you look at the newspapers, you can see which articles were written by men, which by women, unless they are long term profesional journos, then they convert into a non sexual entity, or are they like that in reality anyway?
Any institution or person using this site or any of its associated sites for study or projects - You do not have my permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current or future. If you have or do, it will be considered a serious violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.
Thursday 13 September 2012
13-09-2012
Has been a weird couple of day's, have had to tell the 2nd women that I love, that I will never want anything of her, if I want to continue to be able to see her, I will have to make that consetion. But at the same time, this Lesbian life is oh so confusing for me.
I am attracted to a woman I can in no way, have any form of fun with, she appears to be happily married to a man, no kids, medical reasons. There does seems to be something mutual there, she said something about my hair yesterday, I said I would love to see hers, she's muslim, I then felt highly honoured, as she then said, she will show me, when there are no guy's around, she is fully aware of my history, but it means that she only thinks of me as a woman.
She isn't a stick insect figured woman, but with a proper curvey body, this is oh so strange for me, it is in no way anywhere near how I have felt before, when attracted to somebody, but this is in no way means I was just over confused with A, I do love that woman, she helped to open my eye's to one side of woman hood that I may never have seen, I sure as hell would never have experienced lesbian sex with out her, and am in no way complaining, lets be seriouse, can oh so do without a guy ramming his bits into me, lets be seriouse; lesbian sex is oh so more loving, more tender, just oh so WOW.
I know A will read this sometime, she will know that the hormonal side of womanhood was such a surprise for me, admittedly she was part of the reason it was awakened in me, hey, anything involving A and me, I'm not complaining. No matter what, I can alway's talk to A, I can be completely open with her, and she can be oh so understanding too, I know she say's she loves me, and she must, as she trying oh so hard to understand us, she's even tried to find out all about CX GIC, Charing Cross Gender Identity Clinic, however, all that did, was confuse her even more, never know, she might come with me, to my next visit at the end of the month.
Any institution or person using this site or any of its associated sites for study or projects - You do not have my permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current or future. If you have or do, it will be considered a serious violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.
Has been a weird couple of day's, have had to tell the 2nd women that I love, that I will never want anything of her, if I want to continue to be able to see her, I will have to make that consetion. But at the same time, this Lesbian life is oh so confusing for me.
I am attracted to a woman I can in no way, have any form of fun with, she appears to be happily married to a man, no kids, medical reasons. There does seems to be something mutual there, she said something about my hair yesterday, I said I would love to see hers, she's muslim, I then felt highly honoured, as she then said, she will show me, when there are no guy's around, she is fully aware of my history, but it means that she only thinks of me as a woman.
She isn't a stick insect figured woman, but with a proper curvey body, this is oh so strange for me, it is in no way anywhere near how I have felt before, when attracted to somebody, but this is in no way means I was just over confused with A, I do love that woman, she helped to open my eye's to one side of woman hood that I may never have seen, I sure as hell would never have experienced lesbian sex with out her, and am in no way complaining, lets be seriouse, can oh so do without a guy ramming his bits into me, lets be seriouse; lesbian sex is oh so more loving, more tender, just oh so WOW.
I know A will read this sometime, she will know that the hormonal side of womanhood was such a surprise for me, admittedly she was part of the reason it was awakened in me, hey, anything involving A and me, I'm not complaining. No matter what, I can alway's talk to A, I can be completely open with her, and she can be oh so understanding too, I know she say's she loves me, and she must, as she trying oh so hard to understand us, she's even tried to find out all about CX GIC, Charing Cross Gender Identity Clinic, however, all that did, was confuse her even more, never know, she might come with me, to my next visit at the end of the month.
Any institution or person using this site or any of its associated sites for study or projects - You do not have my permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current or future. If you have or do, it will be considered a serious violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.
Tuesday 4 September 2012
04-09-2012
Final day here today, as per, has been oh so chilled,and as per, No hasle at all. Everybody has been their usual cheerful selves, no body has had no time for us, in fact seem, to go out of their way's, to be oh so nice to me, is alway's so good to come here, knowing there will never be any hasle, and also, the fact that the Teddy Bear is in Charge nowaday's, and that the idiot is gone now, he was oh so lucky, firstly that I never did anything, to defend myself, and secondly, the Police down here are oh so ignorant, I could have caused oh so many problems for them.
Any institution or person using this site or any of its associated sites for study or projects - You do not have my permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current or future. If you have or do, it will be considered a serious violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.
Saturday 1 September 2012
01-09-2012
OMG, awesome new's, been in touch with A, from the Regimental Museum , what TS chatted about at Cav-Mem, has been confirmed, we are hosting Rememberance, and as am the only 'Female' from the Regiment proper, not attached, damn good chance that I'll be one of the wreath layers, brilliant, so as well as being featured in a magazine article, working on a film, will now also be on television. now that is what you call a Real Life Experience. Just wish that all would equate to happiness and success.
I so keep getting tempted to do the writing bit, but keep getting stopped, by the starting point, if I was to rely on past life experience, it would all be so macho, the only real life experience I have had was as a man, also as a soldier, not very girly.
Day One proper of haven, again, arrived last night, fridge/freezer kept blowing the fuses in the 'van, got a temperary fridge installed, supposed to be getting an electrician coming around on Monday, will end up replacing fridge/freezer I reckon. Big Andy, Security is still here, he's now the Supervisor, not bad considering they refused to renew his contract at the beginning of the year, until the owners then turned around, and Haven were informed, That They Would Be? Also, under him, the are cracking down on Idiots, idiots that have problem with what they believe people genders are, even though peoples choices are bugger all to with them. As big, and as hard he looks, maybe, Big Andy will alway's be a cuddly bear to me.
Any institution or person using this site or any of its associated sites for study or projects - You do not have my permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current or future. If you have or do, it will be considered a serious violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.
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